Where everybody knows your name…

I was born in Mumbai and lived there for a grand total of eight months, which was also the amount of time it took my parents to get to the airport from the hospital in Mumbai traffic. Even today, when you’re on the western express highway, if you look out of your window, you can see soiled nappies strewn all along the side.

Since then, for the 25 years or so of my existence, I have lived, laughed, passed, failed, loved, lost, been heart-broken, gotten drunk, gotten sick, been hungover, and recovered, all in the wonderful, glorious (EFF OFF, Lonely Planet) city of Chennai. Yep, the longest continuous stretch of time I’ve been away from here during this period is four months. And now, I’m leaving the city without a clear return date.

I’m moving to London on work and I don’t know how long I’ll be there. As far as I can see right now, this will be my last week in Chennai for a while. The next time I come here, I’ll most probably only be ‘visiting’. That just sounds wrong, even inside my head.

Yes, I know there are a lot of exciting things about leaving home and living on your own and all that, and make no mistake about it, I am pretty excited. But I’m also quite realistic. I’m not going, “GEE! I can finally pull girls in the club and bring them back to my place for sexytime! (wink)”. No. Just no. No, because frankly, I know that that’s only possible if there’s rohypnol involved and I’m pretty sure that’s frowned upon irrespective of whether my parents are in the house or not. In fact, the former might be preferable because they wouldn’t call the cops in on their own son. Hopefully.

In most western countries, a guy moves out in his late teens, mostly because there isn’t enough closet space at home for both his and his dad’s guns. Here in India, (going by the definitive guide to Indian society: Sooraj Barjatya movies) we prefer nice big happy joint families, and that brings us our most serious social ill, the Saas-Bahu conflict.

All joking aside, I even made a list of pros and cons about my upcoming move to figure out if I was getting a good deal. This is what I have so far:

Pro: I’m getting an opportunity to experience the famed ‘British culture’. Con: ‘British culture’ consists mainly of binge drinking, football hooliganism and knife-crime.

Pro: I can walk back home late at night without getting chased by suspicious street dogs who always seem to think I’m some kind of insane dog-hunter who preys on them at night. Con: I might get attacked by ‘youth gangs’, which are also an important component of ‘British culture’.

Pro: I can drink outside for a lot longer every night, have a wide variety of alcoholic beverages to choose from and a wider variety of pubs, with endearing names like ‘The Toad In The Hole’, to do this in. Con: Liver damage and early death.

Pro: I can go to the Emirates and watch Arsenal play every weekend. Yay! Con: No, I cannot, unless I want to be bankrupt and homeless very soon. Also, they don’t even telecast all the games on TV over there, so I’ll have to rely on shady internet streams from Iraq.

Pro: It’s not as hot there and rains more often. Con: It’s very cold there and rains too bloody often.

Pro: I can finally get out of my nerdy, loser-ish ‘quizzer’ image, and acquire a new, much cooler one, like ‘that bloody Paki dog’. Con: There’re no proper quizzes there. I want quizzes.

Pro: There are pub quizzes though! Con: Liver damage and early death.

You all get the picture, don’t you? After all this analysis, the truth is staring me in the face. There aren’t really any advantages in moving out and living on my own. I’m just going to be lonely, cold and miserable for the foreseeable future. 😦

Hopefully, now that I’ve made yet another effort to revive this blog, it shall keep me company while I feel homesick and reminisce like hell about Chennai. So, here’s to a new city and a new life. Cheers! Hic.


February 4, 2010 at 12:39 pm 16 comments

General Ponderings

I really want to start blogging again. 😦

December 5, 2009 at 4:50 pm 9 comments

The QFI Open Quiz 2009

The Quiz Foundation of India (Chennai Chapter), in association with Indian Terrain is proud to announce ‘The QFI Open Quiz 2009’, the fifth edition of the annual open quiz, which has become a fixture on the Chennai quizzing calendar.

The QFI Opens of the last four years have been resounding successes, attracting more than 120 teams each time, including some from Hyderabad, Bangalore, Mumbai and even Ahmedabad. This time, the quiz promises to be both bigger and better. You can read The Hindu’s review of the QFI Open 2006 here, and the 2007 edition here.

Apart from being original, well researched and immensely entertaining, the QFI Open also aims at making quizzing a fun experience for everyone involved. It will try and bring to a wider audience the same mix of light-hearted fun and serious high-standard quizzing that is seen at QFI’s fortnightly meetings.

It is an open quiz with no conditions whatsoever for participation. All are welcome to participate. Prizes include cash and Landmark gift vouchers. I will be conducting the quiz helped with research from my team-mates Krishnamurti and Vikram. Please do come and have fun. There will a Sports and Entertainment quiz in the morning at 10:30 a.m conducted by Rajen Prabhu a.k.a Sumo at the same venue. Plenty of audience prizes from Landmark and DilSeBol also on offer. The details are as follows:

Date: 7th of June, 2009 (Sunday)

Venue: Museum Theatre,
Govt. Museum, Pantheon Road,
Egmore, Chennai – 600008

Schedule of Events

Sports and Entertainment Quiz

Quizmaster: Rajen Prabhu

Research Team: Sreeram, Vijay Sarathy, Vinod Ganesh, Krishnamurti Ganesh, Vikram Rajan, Sivakumar V.V.

Timings: Prelims – 10:30 a.m. and Finals – 11:30 a.m.

Team size: Maximum of 2 members

Registration Fee: Rs. 50 per team. (This fee is waived for school teams. The registration fee must be paid at the registration desk in front before the quiz.)

General Quiz

Quizmaster: Vinod Ganesh

Research Team: Krishnamurti Ganesh, Vikram Rajan

Timings: Prelims – 03:30 p.m. and Finals – 05:00 p.m.

Team size: Maximum of 3 members

Registration Fee: Rs. 50 per team. (This fee is waived for school teams. The registration fee must be paid at the registration desk in front before the quiz.)

Also, if it’s not too much to ask for, please put this up on your blogs and bulletin boards and help spread the word. Thanks!!

Sample Questions from the last edition

Q1. During the 1994 FIFA World Cup in the United States, the teams usually travelled with a group of journalists from their nation. One of these flights had suffered a major delay, and the passengers finally started boarding after a frustrating long wait. During the routine security check, when one of the journalists was asked what he had in his bag, he sarcastically replied that he had a bomb. This sparked off a panic among the passengers, and nearly caused the flight to be cancelled. What did this incident lead to?

Q2. What word comes from the Latin for “I will please”, because it is used to denote something that is given merely to please than to actually benefit?

Q3. The Hellenistic Ptolemaic dynasty, which ruled Egypt from 305 BC to 30 BC, issued a series of decrees over the course of their reign. The first one, issued in 239 BC by Ptolemy III, was called the Decree of Canopus. The second one, issued by Ptolemy IV in 216 BC, was called the Decree of Memphis. The third was issued by Ptolemy V in 196 BC. Why is it famous?

Q4. These are a special kind of military bullets are modified with a small pyrotechnic charge added in their base. Ignited upon firing, the composition burns very brightly making the projectile path visible to the naked eye. This enables the shooter to follow the bullet’s trajectory relative to the target in order to make corrections to his aim for the next shot. The British introduced this in 1915, and the U.S. did it two years later in 1917. What is this type of ammunition called?


A1. Dennis Bergkamp was traumatised and developed his famous fear of flying that would lead him to miss a number of matches overseas for both club and country.

A2. Placebo

A3. This was the inscription on the Rosetta Stone. It describes the repealing of various taxes and gives instructions to erect statues in temples.

A4. Tracer Bullets, familiar to us through the cricket commentary of Ravi Shastri.

May 17, 2009 at 9:07 am 1 comment

Arsene Knows

A fantastic article about one of the men I admire the most.

Right here.

Some excerpts:

“If you do not balance the books you go bankrupt and die. I could push the club into big debt. I go away with success and the guy who comes after me suffers for five years because he cannot buy a player any more and the club goes down. The guy who comes after me has good players he can work with, he has a healthy financial situation, and he has a club in good shape. That is part of management as well.”

“I feel if you come into a club as manager you have first to work out its specific qualities,” Wenger says. “For me Arsenal is a club which tries to respect tradition, style, honesty, fair play. If you come in and behave like a gangster you will not last long. The supporters will be the first ones not happy with that. A club needs values. If a club has no values you go nowhere.”

But I ask, speaking as a father of a five-year-old, what can I teach him at that age? “To kick correctly the ball. To put him in situations where he develops his skill. The talent of a coach is to put an exercise to a player that he has to find the solution to. If he does not, you teach him to do it better. If the exercise is too easy, or too difficult, he will not learn. And he has to find it out for himself. What makes football special is you have a billion techniques. It is not like in tennis where you hit the ball.” Wenger demonstrates a low forehand. Then, with more demonstration, he adds, “In football when you come to hit the ball you have someone pushing you on the top of your left shoulder, and you still have to keep your balance and hit the ball right. At the start your basic movements have to be right, then you adapt.”

August 23, 2008 at 11:24 am 16 comments

The defence now has a Silvestre lining

The first rumours surfaced yesterday morning, and initially they caused shock. Arsenal to sign Mikael Silvestre from Manchester United? Surely it was a joke. A player who had plied his trade at one of the club’s most hated rivals for the last nine years. A player on the wrong side of 30. A player who was never top quality, even at his peak. A player who had missed most of the last two seasons because of injury. And last but not the least, a player who looked like a MORON. Silvestre seemed to tick all the wrong boxes.

It seemed completely wrong, but suddenly it was everywhere – the newspapers, the blogs, the chat forums. All the talk was about how Arsene Wenger had finally lost it. But knowing the manager, and how he liked to surprise the fans, there was this feeling in the pit of my stomach that was telling me this wasn’t just one of those regular baseless rumours. And then this morning, when I woke up and did my customary check of the Arsenal website. I find myself staring at this on the home page.


Yes, he has been signed. And now, after a full day of thinking about it, the deal seems pretty sensible to me. After all, Silvestre is a player with loads of Premier League and Champions League experience, playing for one of the top sides. And I don’t think he’s going to be considered first-choice in any case. As a substitute, I can’t think of too many better. he can play all across the back four, and is experienced enough to be able to come on in the second half of an important away game and fit in right away. For instance, if Arsenal are 1-0 up in the 70th minute at Anfield, and Gallas picks up a knock, I don’t think too many Arsenal fans would rather see Senderos come on than Silvestre. At just 750,000 pounds, he’s a bargain.

Moreover, Justin Hoyte left for Middlesbrough last week, for 3 million and so, a replacement was required. I just hope Wenger still plans on signing that new defensive midfielder he promised a couple of weeks back. That could make or break our title hopes, I feel. And believe it or not, this signing has actually made me feel a little better about the defensive back-up, and therefore the season itself.

We’re off to a good start in the league, beating West Brom 1-0, with a patched up midfield. Spurs lost, and Man Utd drew, so the opening weekend was almost perfect. Hopefully, the good times will continue this weekend at Craven Cottage, against Fulham. Also, from Gunnerblog, it looks like Arsene Wenger was in Switzerland last night to watch Gokhan Inler in action against Cyprus. So, here’s to hoping this week brings at least one more piece of incoming transfer news! Cheers!

August 21, 2008 at 11:57 am 13 comments

The name’s Bond. James Bond.

I had a Rs. 1001 voucher to use up at Odyssey. So I enter the store the day before yesterday, and almost immediately, notice this:

The price: Rs. 995. Only. For 14 books! Super! Picked up. Billed. That’s the way all shopping should happen, IMHO.

The complete James Bond collection, by Ian Fleming, with nice, tacky, retro cover design (I’m a sucker for nice looking covers). Being a stickler for order, I will obviously start reading with Book 1 – which is ‘Casino Royale’, and hopefully will get to Book 8 – ‘For Your Eyes Only’ by November. Why? Because that’s the book that contains the short story ‘Quantum Of Solace’, and that’s the month the movie ‘Quantum Of Solace’ is out. Reports say that the film’s plot is in no way related to the story, and that only the title is borrowed, but it would just give me some mental satisfaction to have read it beforehand.

August 20, 2008 at 11:47 am 8 comments

Arsenal Season 2008-09 Preview

Last year, at around this time, I was very scared for Arsenal. Thierry Henry, the club’s record goal scorer had left for sunny Barcelona, leaving behind an injury-prone Robin van Persie and error-prone Emmanuel Adebayor to bear the goal-scoring responsibilities. His replacement was an unknown Croat-brazilian, Eduardo Da Silva, who was largely untested outside the Croatian Football League. The only other big signing had been Bacary Sagna, a right-back I’d never even heard of. This was all admittedly underwhelming. The pundits had written the club off for the season and many of the fans had already started making their excuses. Most of them were afraid that Arsene Wenger had completely lost it and his stubborn insistence on not buying big-name stars would cost the club dearly. They were all wrong.

The team was outstanding for most of the season and finished 3rd, a mere four points behind the eventual champions Manchester United. Two of the draws (Birmingham away, Liverpool away) turning into victories and the loss to Man Utd at Old Trafford turning into a draw was all that had separated Wenger’s boys from the title. All three results very much possible given the performances in those games. It WAS actually that close. 

The Champions League, well, Arsenal was six minutes away from qualifying for the semi-finals and two dodgy penalty calls in either leg of the quarter-final against Liverpool cost the club. I know it’s said that dodgy calls even out in the end. But I feel calls going our way in games against Derby County when we’re 3-0 up don’t quite match up to calls going against us in a two-legged Champions League quarterfinal where away goals count more. So they don’t quite even out, do they. Anyway, so that was that. The F.A. Cup and Carling Cup, well, we just weren’t good enough. Overall, a season that left all Arsenal fans feeling deeply unfulfilled.

So, after a summer of transfer activity and a bunch of pre-season friendlies, what does the new season have in store? Here are my thoughts:

The Team

Goalkeeping: Jens Lehmann has left for Stuttgart. As much as I liked him, he was making too many mistakes towards the end and it was time for him to leave. The current no. 1, Manuel Almunia, is not as spectacular as Lehmann was but he’s pretty calm and solid and doesn’t make too many costly errors these days, like he used to when he started out. I would like a better keeper but am not too worried. The back-up keeper, Lukasz Fabianski, looks pretty promising though. I was at the Emirates Stadium when the lad made his competitive debut (against Newcastle United in the Carling Cup) and he’s shown enough promise to suggest that Almunia won’t be first choice for too long. The third keeper, Vito Mannone, has been promoted from the reserves and is still an unknown quantity at the top level.

Defence: Unchanged from last season and not too worrying. The full-backs, Bacary Sagna and Gael Clichy are the best full-back pairing in the league for me. Strong both in attack and defence, it was no surprise that the pair made it into the PFA team of the year last season. The centre-backs, Kolo Toure and William Gallas, are pretty solid as well, with some weaknesses that I’m sure the boss would’ve addressed in training. The back-ups are a bit weak though. In the full-back roles, Justin Hoyte is pretty average and Armand Traore is still not quite the finished product yet. Kieran Gibbs has been tried out at left back but he also needs more time to get used to it, being primarily an attacking midfielder. In fact, I should think Gallas will slot into left-back if Clichy ever gets injured before a big game. Emmanuel Eboue can always do a job at right-back if required, having started his career there. The centre-half backups are slightly better. Philippe Senderos and Johan Djourou, the former in particular, get a lot of stick but I don’t think they’re all that bad. Plus, there’s Alexandre Song to return from the Olympics. He was pretty solid in the Carling Cup last year. So, overall, the first choice back four is excellent, but two or more injuries at the same time may see the defensive performances suffer.

Midfield: The biggest cause of worry this pre-season, without a shadow of a doubt. Aleksandr Hleb, Gilberto Silva and Mathieu Flamini left over the summer and Lassana Diarra left in January. So the team has lost 4 top class midfielders this year alone. Diarra was never in the team enough but I still rate him very highly. It’s only a matter of time before he joins a big club again. Gilberto, I’ve always felt, was very very over-rated and frankly, was happy when he was marginalised last season. I also felt it contributed to the team’s success. Having said that, he was a thorough professional till the end and always came out as decent and sincere in the six years he spent at Arsenal. For that reason, I was sorry to see him go. Hleb and Flamini are a different story. Both of them will be greatly missed in the team. Flamini was the midfield dynamo last season, the Roy Keane in our team. Constantly running and tackling, breaking the opponents’ rhythm, Flamini’s manic energy drove the team last season, and was critical to its success. We haven’t replaced him, yet. Hleb, most would say, didn’t contribute too much in terms of assists or goals, but his value went beyond that. His dribbling drew defenders towards him, allowing other players to make their runs. And he would more often than not, supply the killer pass that would lead to an assist. Statistics don’t reveal his true worth. However, he acted like an idiot towards the end and I was not one bit sorry to see him go. We have replaced him adequately, however, I feel. Now, on to the guys who are still there!

In the middle, Cesc Fabregas is the jewel in Arsenal’s crown. Without doubt, the fulcrum around which the team revolves, he will be crucial to our title chances. Still only 21, he has improved every year and is now one of the finest central midfielders in the world. If he is injured, Arsenal would have a big problem. His midfield partner is the big question mark: The pecking order is currently Abou Diaby, Denilson and 17-year old Aaron Ramsey, but Wenger is in the market for another ‘experienced’ defensive midfielder and I fancy that player, whoever it is (looking likely to be Gokhan Inler, from Udinese), to be the first choice. The dark horse for this position could be Alexandre Song, who excelled in the role for Cameroon in the African Nations Cup earlier this year. Another intriguing addition to the squad is Amaury Bischoff, signed from Werder Bremen, for whom he made one start in the last two years, being injured for the rest of the time.  Nothing much is really known about the guy and even Wenger himself has admitted the signing is a gamble. We can only wait and watch.

On the wings, Tomas Rosicky, the Czech captain, if fully fit, is a superstar and crowd favourite. Absolutely electrifying and a match-winner on his day. Samir Nasri, Hleb’s replacement, (and the most promising of the many French youngsters touted as the ‘next Zidane’) is sharp, quick and blessed with exquisite technique. At home in the middle of the pitch, and on both wings, he is a superb addition to the squad and if he stays fit, could make the difference between this season and last. Theo Walcott, good on both sides, is steadily improving and should be more of a consistent force this year. Emmanuel Eboue may be extremely irritating but does a decent job on the right most times. The only other option on the wings is also the most exciting – Jack Wilshere, aged 16. He joined Arsenal as a nine-year old school boy in 2001 and has really caught the eye this pre-season. Wenger has already seen enough quality to include him in the first team squad and though he won’t get too many starts this season, training with the big boys will help him improve and he may even get to make a couple of cameo appearances. 

Attack: Doubtlessly, Arsenal’s best area. We’re well-stocked with forwards, and all of them have enough quality. Emmanuel Adebayor has come on in leaps and bounds last season, ensuring that we didn’t miss the legend that is Thierry Henry. That takes some doing! Robin van Persie is someone I rate extremely highly. He’s a fantastic talent, with a supernatural left foot.  A constant threat from free-kicks and also a great provider for others, his only problem is that he seems to be made of glass. He spent most of last season on the treatment table and one can only wonder what could’ve been if he’d been fit throughout. Eduardo Da Silva, so cruelly injured last season just when he was getting into his groove, is expected to be back before Christmas and he is a truly lethal finisher, as proved by his Arsenal scoring record so far (22 starts, 12 goals). I remember going berserk in a pub when Song put him through in extra time against Blackburn in the Carling Cup. There was just no doubt he would tuck it in! That was also one of the best games of last season, for me. And I’m licking my lips at the prospect of what’s going to happen once he’s settled in completely. Nicklas Bendtner is again, quality. Tall, strong, and determined, the guy is a superstar in waiting. I half-expect Adebayor to leave next summer and mark my words, if Bendtner is still there, he will more than adequately replace him. Carlos Vela, an Arsenal player for the last three years but out on loan in Spain, looks a terrific prospect, another typical Wenger signing – out of nowhere. He’s been absolutely brilliant in pre-season. I expect Bendtner and Vela to form a lethal partnership in the Carling Cup. Apart from these five, Walcott can also play up front if necessary.

My first choice eleven would be as follows:


Bacary Sagna – Kolo Toure – William Gallas – Gael Clichy

Samir Nasri – Cesc Fabregas – (New Guy) – Tomas Rosicky

Emmanuel Adebayor – Robin van Persie


Overall, while the starting eleven is top-notch,  the back-ups are not of the highest quality and I suspect this will make the difference through the course of a long and hard season. The fan in me says we’ll win something this year, but I fancy it’ll be more a case of finishing in the top 4 in the Premier League and going as far as we possibly can in the Champions League and the F.A. Cup. As far as the Carling Cup is concerned, the youngsters are a year older, so we could actually do pretty well again.

So, hoping for the best, Go Gunners!!

August 14, 2008 at 7:58 pm 15 comments

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This blog was previously published at http://vinodg.blogspot.com.


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